Blue in the Sky

A lesbian wife and mother tries her hand at something new. Surely there is a hat that fits out there somewhere!

Once Upon a Time…. Sunday August 31, 2008

Filed under: Daily Life,Music — The Professor @ 9:40 am

I taught a class on the Psychology of Women.  Ahh…… Those were the days.  I have never worked harder on a course and if I do say so myself….it was fabulous.  So, I’m telling you this because I was reminded of the class yesterday while wasting time on YouTube.  I was looking around for demonstrations of handfasting ceremonies to send to Charlie, when I was distracted by a musician who I haven’t thought about for a while.  Dar Williams.  In my Psych of Women class I had a kind of soundtrack for the course in which as students got to class (5 min or so before start time) a song related to the topic for the day would be playing.  They loved it and I loved it and it was tons of fun.  One of the songs that they were the most responsive to was a Dar Williams song that I used early in the course to start the conversation on gender and gender roles.  The song is called “When I was a Boy” and it is just amazing.  I love, love, love the idea of being “just a small boy on her bike”.  Yesterday I found a video of the song and just sat in front of my computer crying.  Yeh, it’s been that kind of a weekend 😉  So, I’m adding a link here and I think you should check it out.  It’s worth your time for sure!



And if that totally wrecks you, I suggest the pick me up that I selected for myself.  It certainly did the trick.  Yes, I’m talking about Amy Ray again ;).  This is a video of Amy and Brandi Carlile (also fabulous in her own right) singing a solo tune of Amy’s called Johnny Rottentale.  All I have to say is “Um, excuse me Brandi.  Can I sing your part?  Yeh?  Thanks!”



Oh to be a Cat…… Friday August 29, 2008

Filed under: Daily Life,Wedding Planning — The Professor @ 2:59 pm


Life has been moving at a pace that is not consistent with blogging.  I hate that.  So…. I’m fighting back.  Grrrrr.

Sure, classes have started and I’m in a new role (Assistant Prof baby!), Toad has a major board exam in about ten days and we’re getting married only a few days after that.  It’s not like anything is going on around here ;).  I’ve decided to start taking my cues from Gadget.  In spite of the rising stress level in the house, he stands strong.  The boy is hellbent on maintaining what Toad likes to call his “rigorous napping schedule”.  He WILL NOT be moved.  “Wedding? Schmedding!” says the boy.  I think he’s onto something.

Ok, a few wedding updates.

  • Rings are here and beautiful
  • The ceremony will be at 6 at the Fellowship.  We have made the decision to broaden the circle a bit and invite a few more folks.  We’re thinking we’ll have about thirty.  It will take place in front of big floor to ceiling windows that overlook a garden.  It’s a lovely spot.  We’re still working on vows and readings.
  • Toad’s suit is only moments from completion.  She has done a few fittings and she’s feeling good about it.  I haven’t seen anything yet, but I know she will be wearing black pants, a black vest and some kind of ivory shirt.
  • My dress has been purchased and is fabulous (it’s royal blue), but I’m going to scan my options one last time this weekend to seal the deal.  Now that she’s wearing ivory, I’m thinking that could be nice.  Decisions, decisions.  Still need shoes (I’m thinking strappy sandals – Toad wants em flat, she’s a mini Toad) and some jewelry.  That needs to be finalized this weekend.
  • We are meeting with the florist on Tuesday and have a pretty good sense of what we’re looking for.
  • Toad’s Mom has agreed to take care of the cake and I’m excited about her ideas.  She’s found a baker in town who does cool box shaped cakes that look like gift boxes.  We’re thinking about three boxes spread out along a central table.  A cool idea.
  • Catering plans are underway and close to final.  We are going with our favorite Sunday afternoon restaurant and I love that!  They have great food and they’ve played a role in our relationship.  We’ve made a lot of big decisions on their couches.

I think we are going to make it!


Happy Birthday Friend!! Thursday August 28, 2008

Filed under: Friends — The Professor @ 9:25 pm


Today my most fabulous T turns 30.  You know that you have a good friend when:

  • YOU get a call on HER birthday
  • She’s willing to watch Hedwig with you one more time
  • She sends you cards that are sometimes funny and sometimes sweet, for no reason at all
  • You come home from a visit at her house to discover that she has conducted a photo shoot (with your camera) featuring the hind quarters of her daughters’ toys (see selections above) bc she knew it would make you laugh
  • You occasionally hear things like “Sure, we’d love to go to Mellow Mushroom with you again this week”
  • She brings cake to your house for your Mom’s birthday
  • She laughs at every single one of your jokes
  • She doesn’t freak out when you cry and she would never let you do it alone
  • She always takes you seriously, even when you’re kind of wondering yourself
  • Every time she hears that thing in your voice, she immediately says “You know, it wouldn’t take me that long to get there.”

That’s love.


Everyone Needs a Wife Tuesday August 12, 2008

Filed under: Daily Life — The Professor @ 4:45 pm

As much fun as traveling is, there’s nothing quite like coming home.  I got in last night to some of my favorite things:  fresh flowers on the dining room table,  clean house, folded laundry, stocked fridge, chatty/snuggly Gadget, and a Toad who was thrilled to see me.  I remember a psych professor in college explaining that the punch line from the bulk of research on individual life outcomes for single and married adults indicates that having a wife is tremendously beneficial.  If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times.  Everyone needs a wife.  I’m a lucky girl!!


All Bella, All the Time

Filed under: Babies — The Professor @ 11:21 am


I have spent the last few days in Atlanta.  With Bella.  Can you tell?!!  Although she was the highlight of the trip, it was also great to see her parents.  Always great to see them.  To sit down and talk face to face with the folks that (at least in adulthood) have known me the longest and best.  There’s something really comforting about that.  Other things may change and shift, but these guys have been with me for the long haul.  Through the really nitty gritty.  I can count on Z to wear black or tie-dye and call it like he sees it and I can count on T to cook me my favorite things (pesto, yum!) and somehow always get the wild places I’m occasionally coming from.  Those are hardly small things.

As Bella enters month three, I’ve picked up on a few changes.  The most obvious, is that she’s a tad smellier than she used to be.  Her Dad doesn’t call her “smelly belly” for nothing.  😉  She is also looking more like a person and less like an infant.  Her face is really expressive and you can already start to see a bit of her personality in it.  It is also true that the girl has some big feet.  Long and narrow.  If she were a puppy, that would indicate that she will be a big dog.  Not sure what big feet means for a baby, although I would imagine it’s similar.  She also likes to keep the feet moving.  Lots of kicking around and pretty strong kicking from a person that weighs less than Gadget.  Toad has got an eye on the running potential of those little legs.  Watch out Bella….


In My Head Sunday August 3, 2008

Filed under: Daily Life — The Professor @ 7:57 pm

It’s been one of those days.  The kind of days where you’re trapped in your head and you can’t get out.  Spinning and spinning and still, ultimately stuck.  I’m not really a fan of days like these.  Trying to keep in mind that all the spinning will get me somewhere eventually, just not on my schedule.  Oh to be truly patient….

It started this morning at the lake.  Watching the sun come up, listening as my feet hit the ground.  An hour and a half of quiet thinking.  Sometimes that’s a good thing and sometimes it’s not.  Today it felt heavy and foggy and just plodding.  Then it was on to church.  Also, usually a good thing.  Today it was a hard thing.  A lot of pain and confusion and sadness in the wake of last week’s shooting at the UU congregation in Knoxville (  Trying to make some sense of it.  Trying to learn the lesson. 

At this moment, I don’t know.  My heart feels as foggy as my head.