Maybe it’s the fact that the sun is shining when I had expected rain or that I am experiencing my first cold med free day in recent memory. I’m not sure what it is, but I’m having a calm, quiet kind of introspective day. This hasn’t happened in a while. For the last few weeks I have been either spinning manically within all of the possibilities and choices that lie ahead or crashed on the couch devoid of energy and making my sneezy way through another box of kleenex. The calm middle ground has eluded me.
Today it feels different, quieter inside. I’m grateful for that. From here I feel reasonably sure that the next few months will unfold as they will. A home will be rented, a move will take place, a decision will be made about my work life, a baby will be born. All of these things will happen. It is even likely that all of this will happen more smoothly without my crazed organization of every piece of it. It’s hard for me to admit that one, but I do believe it’s true.
And one of the main reasons that is possible for me to take a good deep breath these days is bc somehow I have had the unimaginably good fortune to take all of this on with Toad. I really must have done something wonderful in my last life to have found her. She’s not perfect and life isn’t filled with roses and laughing at every turn, but she is deeply, deeply right for me. We fit together in a way I didn’t think was possible. Not in a “you complete me” kind of way, but rather in a “that makes sense to you?! Are you serious, you get that?” fashion. I have found a real home with her and happily I am very much aware that I have been blessed beyond measure.
All that AND she looks cute with a carrot. 😉