In Chapter Nine, Kathy describes her plan for “personal energy management”. Personal energy sounds like a good thing to manage, no?
Her plan? Focus on the four R’s in order to keep your life in balance. The 4 R’s are:
- Here is where your everyday routine and set obligations lie.
- Most of our energy is spent in this one domain (there is always more to do)
- The paradox of this R is that the more you do, the more there is to be done
- Perfectionists are particularly likely to spend all of their energy here and feel that life is about nothing more than keeping your head above water
- Kathy’s advice – check off the items on your to-do list, but don’t worry about dotting every i and crossing every t
- Here is where we manage the large and small relationships in our lives (managing conflict, negotiating desires and needs, etc)
- Some of the tasks here might be learning to be more intimate and authentic, observing healthy boundaries and being responsible with your words and actions
- Here is where we focus on self-care, which looks different for everyone
- Ask yourself each day what you need to take of yourself in that moment acknowledging that this might change from day to day – be present with yourself
- This is where we stretch ourselves beyond what is habitual and comfortable
- Everyone needs to take the occasional leap
- Anything that opens you up and makes you stronger and more self-aware
This makes sense to me. I like the idea of thinking about each of the R’s each day. I am a HUGE proponent of the to-do list and so it’s very easy for me to get trapped into the Regular quadrant.
The chapter closes with the following questions for reflection:
- In which of these areas do I most need to grow?
- What can I do that would support that growth?
For me at this moment, I’m thinking Reach. I need to focus on Reach. Humm……