Blue in the Sky

A lesbian wife and mother tries her hand at something new. Surely there is a hat that fits out there somewhere!

Still Working the Wellness Tuesday May 11, 2010

Filed under: Daily Life,The Adventurer — The Professor @ 1:56 pm

In Chapter Nine, Kathy describes her plan for “personal energy management”.  Personal energy sounds like a good thing to manage, no?

Her plan?  Focus on the four R’s in order to keep your life in balance.  The 4 R’s are:


  • Here is where your everyday routine and set obligations lie.
  • Most of our energy is spent in this one domain (there is always more to do)
  • The paradox of this R is that the more you do, the more there is to be done
  • Perfectionists are particularly likely to spend all of their energy here and feel that life is about nothing more than keeping your head above water
  • Kathy’s advice – check off the items on your to-do list, but don’t worry about dotting every i and crossing every t


  • Here is where we manage the large and small relationships in our lives (managing conflict, negotiating desires and needs, etc)
  • Some of the tasks here might be learning to be more intimate and authentic, observing healthy boundaries and being responsible with your words and actions


  • Here is where we focus on self-care, which looks different for everyone
  • Ask yourself each day what you need to take of yourself in that moment acknowledging that this might change from day to day – be present with yourself


  • This is where we stretch ourselves beyond what is habitual and comfortable
  • Everyone needs to take the occasional leap
  • Anything that opens you up and makes you stronger and more self-aware

This makes sense to me.  I like the idea of thinking about each of the R’s each day.  I am a HUGE proponent of the to-do list and so it’s very easy for me to get trapped into the Regular quadrant.

The chapter closes with the following questions for reflection:

  1. In which of these areas do I most need to grow?
  2. What can I do that would support that growth?

For me at this moment, I’m thinking Reach.  I need to focus on Reach.  Humm……


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s